The Life Ahead

Morning……. finally it was the morning that I had awaited so eagerly for the past 4 years of my life. I was home and had been woken up by the ruckus caused by the maid. It was still early, in fact very very early (Well compared to the standards of the hostels of an engineering college where you go to sleep at 6 in the morning, waking up at 7 is really early). I spent the first 3 to 4 days getting used to the change of being home once again. Timely meals and 3 of them in a day were definitely spoiling me and it was showing as a bulge above my trousers.

Finally on the 28th of April 2005 my dad and I had a little chat, mano-e-mano (Hope I am correct on this one). He got a little schmaltzy and told me about the responsibilities that I had to shoulder and how I had to go about in life. Now comes the most interesting part, he disclosed to me the finances of the family and told me to take over the reigns of the family. I believe I am pretty young for all this but then again, who am I to argue? I still cannot believe I could have been or better phrased my dad could have been so filthy rich. Though I am not much interested in finances (at-least at this point in time), all this did make me think twice about life and am I thankful of being born where I am.

But this is all that is owned by The Family, and I want to make it on my own! Here starts my Destiny ....

The Homecoming

Wounded I Stand, In The Battle Field Of The Dead;
By Destiny To The Victory Was I Led.
Friend And Foe fought Till Last Breath;
As One They Lie In Their Death.
On My Heart Of Stone Is Etched Her Name Forever;
I Move On Again For Never Can It Be Over.
The Dawn Of The Day Gives Me Another Chance;
To Get Ready And Perfect My Last Stance;
For Alone I Will Be Forever;
Till I Find Her Never Can It Be Over.


My thoughts about leaving college and moving on again in life can be best explained by the lines above which I wrote while I was waiting patiently for the train to reach its destination. The destination – Delhi; The capital of the country and a city where many a dreams have come true. But it was just an intermediate stop, for my destination was still about 250 Kms away. It took me 5 hours to reach the city I knew as home, the city where I spent 18 years of my life – The City Beautiful, as the world knows it. Though a major part of the 5 hours of journey was devoted to the memory of my 4 years at the university, but I was still looking forward to seeing my mom after almost 2 years.

Finally I reached home, and wow, it was definitely a homecoming worth having and cherishing. I still don’t know whether it was the fact that their son had come back home after being away so long, or the fact that I was now an engineer (Though the result was still awaited ;-)) that led to such a lavish party being organized. But I sure was happy about the fact that I had a standing of my own in the society (Strange, I never gave it a thought in college).

The booze beckoned me and my dad found me right where he expected – at the bar with my favorite, Vodka with lime cordial, pepper and salt, on the rocks. While he was proud of me and was explaining how I could progress in life, I was planning how I could progress in the night.

How I wish that I could have climbed into my bed and had a peaceful night’s sleep than being thrown into the whirlwind of meeting old friends and sharing stories. But that’s what happens when you get high on vodka, salt, pepper and an awesome group of childhood friends!

The Beginning

Heaven Doesn’t Want Me;
Hellz Afraid I’ll Take Over,
For I Was Born With Death Hovering Upon My Birth;
And My Cradle In The Grave.

With such thoughts as my guiding light, I managed to complete an engineering degree in computers from a very reputed University in India (Supposedly at No. 9 at the time of this writing). Words evade me when I try to describe the eagerness with which I awaited the day when my exams would end. It came, slowly, almost as if it did not wish to come, as if the whole universe wanted that I should keep on writing exam after exam - Indefinitely. Then suddenly it was April the 20th 2005. The last semester had ended. The final nail in the coffin had been hammered in. I was free, free to enjoy my release from the No. 9 prison in India where the inmates are punished for being the top most in terms of academic intelligence.

I left for home, a home which I hadn’t been a part of for the past 4 years. A home where I had spent 18 years of my life before my parents realized “Hey this one is much more intelligent than we thought him to be”. As my train zipped past cities spread over the 2700 Km that I had to travel to reach the place I knew as home, my mind was cluttered with emotions ranging from nostalgia to relief. With my hormones (I believe its testosterone, forgive me if I am wrong for I studied engineering and not medical) arousing me more often, for I was traveling with two very pretty ladies who were my classmates and one of them happened to be my Ex-Girlfriend, I still had enough time to think about my past and try to plan out my future. But for now, I decided that it was to be 3 months of pure fun where I would indulge myself and spoil myself silly.

But alas it was not to be so. I often wonder where my misguided dreams would lead me to. Will I ever achieve what I want to in life? Though I have been lucky enough till now to get more than I ever dreamed of, but will I ever get what I want?? Well enough of philosophy for now, It’s time to say hi to my bed which I haven’t slept in for years.